I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize