In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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