why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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