I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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