Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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