Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
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