it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize