I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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