New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
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Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
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We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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