What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
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