Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Randomize