Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
accomplished twins. life is a go
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she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
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Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
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