When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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