batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize