When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk of Shame today included voting.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
ttyl tear gas
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
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