I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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