There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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