I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
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i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
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