Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin http://tfl.nu/0a0z
  Replies (14) Good night (825) Bad night (2071) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him. http://tfl.nu/jidd
  Replies (27) Good night (6833) Bad night (1420) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?

  (1-920): View more from Wisconsin

  no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  he wasn't. neither were you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss? (1-920): no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom? (920): he wasn't. neither were you. http://tfl.nu/3ltg
  Replies (16) Good night (6901) Bad night (1024)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (250): woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" . http://tfl.nu/721o
  Replies (9) Good night (6292) Bad night (972) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night http://tfl.nu/dx83
  Replies (27) Good night (4876) Bad night (852) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (250): you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in. http://tfl.nu/ux6h
  Replies (7) Good night (1099) Bad night (2805) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation? http://tfl.nu/p01u
  Replies (2) Good night (2379) Bad night (632) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (419): apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty" http://tfl.nu/fxst
  Replies (4) Good night (2426) Bad night (722) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!

  (1-513): View more from Ohio

  Thanks, mom.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection! (1-513): Thanks, mom. http://tfl.nu/k49b
  Replies (17) Good night (3892) Bad night (1068) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (701): second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life. http://tfl.nu/2fc0
  Replies (7) Good night (325) Bad night (1317) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka. http://tfl.nu/ktyc
  Replies (4) Good night (1063) Bad night (372) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (205): I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating. http://tfl.nu/dthl
  Replies (5) Good night (371) Bad night (1172) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter http://tfl.nu/13z8
  Replies (2) Good night (699) Bad night (234) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one http://tfl.nu/3p0c
  Replies (1) Good night (813) Bad night (173) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry http://tfl.nu/g7mi
  Replies (3) Good night (571) Bad night (212) Order T-Shirt

Randomize