listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
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I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
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I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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