Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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