dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
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