I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
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taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
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You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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