were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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