I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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