They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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