Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Randomize
Follow @tfln