They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May the power of my ass compel you!!
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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