Just cropdusted the office
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize