I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
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