Don't worry. I has chaperone.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize