im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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