I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
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The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
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do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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