I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
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