Don't you send me to vm
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
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