Plan B is the new Plan A
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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