P.S. I can't hear my feet
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
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