And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
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She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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