i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
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