jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize