Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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