Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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