dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize