my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
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