the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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