this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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