No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
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