I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
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