How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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