Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize